


Quarry Dreams

by eldercunningbro



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, M/M, character death is in the tags but its just following canon so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 11:02:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20208682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eldercunningbro/pseuds/eldercunningbro
Summary: The quarry itself wasn’t the problem, but the memories the quarry held. He could feel the memories of the place slowly worming themselves back into his brain and he wanted to scream. He didn’t want to remember. He didn’t want to remember the times where he and Stan would sit on the edge of the cliff and bird watch. He didn’t want to remember the times Eddie would scream about all the potential germs and diseases in the water, and he definitely didn’t want to remember the times Eddie would smile brightly at him, droplets of water in his hair and Richie would have to look away, scared if he looked for too long Eddie would figure him out and find out his dirty little secret.Remembering just made the fact they were dead more painful.





	Quarry Dreams

The quarry represented freedom to the losers’ club. It was a haven for the group of friends ever since Bill and Richie had discovered it when they were 10 years old, biking around the outskirts of Derry pretending they were explorers. The quarry was safe. Safe from the judging looks from their peers, safe from the adults, safe from bullies like Henry Bowers and most importantly safe from the lurking horror, the fear that resided in their hometown. The Losers could be themselves in the quarry, they were free from the constraints that Derry had placed them under. Yet despite all this, despite the countless nostalgia filled memories of happy times, Richie could only feel discomfort.

Granted, it had been 27 years since Richie had been back to the quarry. When you grow older, your opinions and feelings change, it’s perfectly normal. He obviously isn’t going to feel the same childhood wonder he felt about the place back when he was 13 years old, 27 years later. But as Richie watched Bill, Bev, Ben and Mike laugh in the water, splashing around like they hadn’t aged a day since that fateful summer, Richie knew this wasn’t the case.

The problem was him.

It was Bill’s idea to go down to the quarry. After killing It they stood around the crumbled remains of the Neibolt House. What was once a domineering, abandoned house of hell was now nothing more than dust and rubble. The only part of the house left standing were the sunflowers that used to surround it, now swaying gently in the breeze. No one said a word. After all there isn’t exactly a guidebook on what to say after defeating a demonic alien clown with your childhood friends who you completely forgot existed till about 24 hours ago. There was a full 5 minutes of silence before Bill spoke up,

“The Q-Q-Quarry…”

What remained of the Loser’s Club turned to Bill and stared at him in confusion. He carried on speaking,

“We…we sh-should go visit the quarry again.”

In an ideal world Richie would have refused immediately. He would have picked himself off the ground and smiled to Bill, putting on one of his voices. Maybe the British guy voice, that was the one he always did as a kid, right?

“Oh my ol’ chap whilst that does sound absolutely smashing, I must say it really is time for me to leave. I hate to leave all of you my good sirs, but the missus has been waiting for me at home, and she will be in a foul mood if I don’t provide her with her hourly love making. This is sad but pip pip and tally ho my good fellows! I will see you again!”

Richie would have finished off with a dramatic bow and the Loser’s would groan in response. Eddie would probably say something about how, “British people don’t even sound like that dickwad,” and Stan would give him that look. To anyone else it would just look like Stan was annoyed or rolling his eyes, but Richie knew better, Stan was his best friend. The look was more than just an annoyed side eye, it was a question. _What are your true feelings Richie? What are you hiding behind the jokes and the voices?_

Richie was always good at ignoring that look. He would pretend he never saw it and turn away. He would joke with the Loser’s, say his goodbyes and get in his car, driving far away. Never to see or hear from Derry again. But that isn’t what happened. Stan and Eddie were dead and Richie had no more fight left in him. So when Bill said they should go to the quarry, he stayed silent. No jokes, no voices, just silence. So when Ben, Bev and Mike all agreed with Bill, he had no choice but to follow.

That’s how he found himself in this situation, sitting on a rock on the side of the water, letting his hair dry off as he watched his childhood friends act like nothing was wrong, like they hadn’t just faced fear itself, like two of their friends weren’t fucking dead. The quarry felt like a huge slap in the face. The place itself wasn’t particularly bad, yes, the water did have a green tint and wasn’t exactly clean but the quarry was nice in its’ own way. Trees surrounded the area, almost as if it was blocking them out from the rest of the world and flowers bloomed from the side of the lake. The quarry was beautiful and didn’t belong in a place full of such horror and hatred like Derry.

The quarry itself wasn’t the problem, but the memories the quarry held. He could feel the memories of the place slowly worming themselves back into his brain and he wanted to scream. He didn’t want to remember. He didn’t want to remember the times where him and Stan would sit on the edge of the cliff and birdwatch. He didn’t want to remember the times Eddie would scream about all the potential germs and diseases in the water, and he definitely didn’t want to remember the times Eddie would smile brightly at him, droplets of water in his hair and Richie would have to look away, scared if he looked for too long Eddie would figure him out and find out his dirty little secret.

Remembering just made the fact they were dead more painful.

“Hey Trashmouth!”

Richie turned quickly and found that Bev was the source of the yell. She smiled at him and waved before swimming over to Richie. When she got to him she leaned on the rock and moved her soaked hair out of her eyes.

“What are you doing over here on your own Rich? Aren’t you coming back in the water? Bill and Ben have been splashing me nonstop and I need your help to take them down.”

Richie smiled weakly as he looked over Bev’s shoulder. Ben and Bill were joking around together and Mike was floating in the water, his eyes closed, the calmest he’d looked since they all reunited. Richie couldn’t imagine the amount of stress Mike had been under the last 27 years. He was the only loser to remember everything, the only one who didn’t leave Derry. Richie didn’t want to imagine the damage that must have caused to Mike’s sanity. He shook his head quickly and turned back to Bev,

“Sorry Bev, looks like you need to take on team double-B on your own. I…I think I might be heading out soon…you can only splash around in shitty water for so long you know?”

Instead of the tired shrug he would expect from Bev, she stared at him in concern. Richie felt his chest tighten as her piercing blue eyes stared through him. It was almost as if…

_…she could read his mind. Richie didn’t know why he was surprised, Bev was like his soulmate. Not in a romantic sense, no, he had no romantic feelings for Bev, she was just the person who understood him the best. They were kindred spirits, often sharing their feelings over a cigarette and laughing at jokes only they would understand. They were sitting on the side of the quarry, sharing a cigarette that Richie had stolen from his dad. It was midnight and it was cold, but neither of them cared, too busy watching the stars together, that were being reflected by the water below. _

_Bev took a long drag of the cigarette and looked at Richie, the embers lighting up her blue eyes as she stared at him in a mixture of concern and empathy. Richie fidgeted uncomfortably, he hated when Bev did this, when she could just read him like a book, figuring out all his deepest thoughts and feelings. She smiled softly at him,_

_ “You like Eddie don’t you?” _

_Richie coughed in surprise and turned to her, despite the panic he felt he kept a smile on his face,_

_ “Bev darling what on Earth are you talking about? Like? Eddie? Of course I do he is my friend, just like you and all the other Loser’s. Though Bill did steal one of my comics recently so maybe like is a bit too much, maybe tolerate? And Mike didn’t let me on his tractor so he’s gone down the list too. Mayb-“_

_ “Beep Beep Richie.”_

_ Richie quickly shut up and stared at Bev. Looking into her eyes he knew she was being serious and wasn’t joking around. That wasn’t going to stop him though. _

_“Ohhhhh…you mean ‘like, like’…well Bev why didn’t you just say so! No I don’t ‘like, like’ Eddie, but I can see your confusion. No, no, it’s Eddie’s mum who is the love of my life! Ever since the first day I saw her when she picked up little Eds from the playground, I knew she was the one.”_

_ Bev groaned and threw what remained of the cigarette down into the water of the quarry._

_ “Hey I still had a puff left, you can’t do tha-“_

_ Bev quickly turned to face him and the expression on her face silenced Richie. _

_“Trashmouth…please…just be honest with me. I don’t care if you like boys, I don’t care if you like Eddie, I just want you to be able to talk to me.” _

_Richie’s smile fell from his face and he took a deep breath,_

_ “The Neibolt House.” _

_For a split second Bev’s expression turned to one of complete fear, but just as quickly as the expression came it left and was replaced with a raised eyebrow in confusion, _

_“What?” _

_“The Neibolt House. That’s when I realised. That’s when I figured out I like Eddie. When me and Bill lost him… I … I heard his voice. I followed it and I didn’t even think fucking twice because I was so concerned with finding him. That’s….That’s when I saw…it…the clown. He said things Bev…About Eddie…I was so fucking scared and if Bill didn’t save me I don’t know what would have happened. When we did find him…I was so relieved…I didn’t want to loss him ever again. B-But…i-it….f-fuck!”_

_ Bev smiled softly at him and rubbed his back,_

_ “You’re stuttering almost as much as Bill…you don’t have to say if you don’t want to.” _

_Richie shook his head, _

_“No…No it’s okay, I’m fine I just….fuck okay…When we found Eddie and the clown was coming towards us…he was whispering to me. It was like he was in my fucking ear and no one else could hear him but me. He told me…he told me not to touch Eddie…or everyone would know my secret…if I touched him everyone would know and leave me…” _

_Bev threw herself at Richie and gave him a tight hug, something she never normally did. The two were close but Bev still had difficulty when it came to close contact with other people. Richie could feel tears pricking in his eyes but held them back. She rubbed his back and he rested his head on her shoulder._

_ “Rich… None of us are going to leave you, I promise. That dumbass clown has no idea what he is talking about, okay? I’m just glad you told me all of this.” _

_Richie sniffed and then sat up in panic, _

_“You can’t tell anyone about this okay? Especially not Eddie. I… I can’t risk anything going wrong. He can’t know!”_

_ “I’m not going to tell anyone… I promise.” _

_Bev gave him a soft smile and that was when Richie knew. He knew that he could trust Bev with anything and no matter what she always…_

…would be able to read Richie. It didn’t matter that they hadn’t seen each other since they were 13, it didn’t matter that they were now in their 40s, Bev would always be able to read Richie and honestly that scared him.

“Rich…come in the water with us…you deserve to have fun, okay? We all do…Let yourself be happy.”

Richie took a deep breath and held back his tears. How could he have fun? How could he be happy? The two most important people in his life were _dead_, and here he was constantly surrounded by memories of them. Stan telling him off for being too noisy around the birds, Eddie pretending to drown him under the water, Stan laughing at Richie when he belly-flopped into the water, every time Eddie smiled at him, Eddie looking like a _fucking angel_.

Richie stood up to the surprise of Bev and he smiled. Both him and Bev knew it was fake but neither said a word,

“I have to go Bev… I’ve done what I need to and it’s really time for me to leave. I have my work to get back to and…you know how it is…”

Richie wished he didn’t see the sad look Bev gave him, the disappointment in her eyes, but at this point he didn’t care. If he stayed in this place any longer he wasn’t sure if he was going to cry or scream or both.

“Aren’t you going to say goodbye to everyone else?”

Richie shook his head,

“No…No…it’s okay, I don’t want to disturb them…Tell them I’m glad we met up again and I’m sorry for leaving so soon…”

Bev nodded and they shared a smile, a smile just like the one 27 years ago when Richie confessed to her at this very quarry. He turned and began to walk away. As he walked he heard Bev yell out to him,

“Promise to keep in touch?”

“Of course,” Richie lied. 

He prayed that forgetting Derry, forgetting the clown and forgetting the Losers would be just as easy as the first time.

**Author's Note:**

> yo thanks to my man miles for actually inspiring my to write again!! its been a while and I think this is the most fun ive had writing a fic!! im so psyched for chapter 2 and I needed something to do during the wait!!
> 
> thank u for reading !!!


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